Where have the old model designations gone?
02/02/2013
Where have all the beautiful old car names gone that have accompanied us for decades? They still sound so confidence-inspiring to our ears, tortured by tongue-twisting abbreviations and meaningless artificial words. Eldorado, Fleetwood, Seville, Deville (all Cadillacs, as it happens, but other brands will follow; don't worry).
Today, customers of the American luxury brand have to choose between SRX, STS, XTS, CTS, ATS or BLS. It's all difficult to categorize, and no picture emerges in the mind's eye. At best, BLS still reminds the Swiss of the Bern-Lötschberg-Simplon Railway. I'm sure some clever marketing person will soon give it an internationally marketable artificial name that no longer has any connection to the mountain world.
Who says a name has to be international? After all, the Americans have also added health, kindergarten and bratwurst to their vocabulary, and they don't even bother with Matterhorn or Heidelberg. Chevrolet is now so international that nobody remembers that old Louis originally came from La Chaux-de-Fonds.
For decades, Opel (despite its American parent company) used catchy model names in the local language to inspire confidence and sales success: Kadett, Rekord, Commodore (should logically have been called "Kommodore"), Senator, Kapitän, Admiral, or even Diplomat.
The longer the list, the more the names melt in the mouth. No comparison with the anonymous Astra and Vectra. And we also miss the letter combinations such as GT/E, GS/E or GSi in view of the unpronounceable OPC. This is no match for GTi. And why is it no longer possible to buy a Caravan? And anyway: Deluxe and Grand Luxe used to be on the side/rear or a representative abbreviation such as L, GL, GLX or S and GT when it was supposed to be sporty. Or nothing at all for the bare basic version. Back then, everything was clear and simple. Today, it is practically impossible to determine the hierarchy level based on the equipment designation.
Ford doesn't do any better. Literally a run-of-the-mill name, namely Mondeo, had to replace the Sierra when the latter had just established itself in people's minds. It in turn followed the grandiose Taunus and Cortina, which were reminiscent of mountains and automotive highlights. The Granada was replaced by the Scorpio. And what hot boxes the RS and XR models were. The Ghia, which always had one more chrome strip than the competition, was at least around for a while. In the meantime, no more.
Where did Datsun er... Nissan left its pretty daughters Silvia, Cherry, Sunny or Bluebird? Weren't they once global successes? The Citroënists, who find their goddess DS ("Déèsse") reborn as a series of compact cars, have been hit very hard. The car, which should at best bear the two heavenly letters with dignity, is punished with a simple C6.
Toyota is also doing badly. The Corolla was the most-built car in the world. But they were not satisfied with first place. There had to be something better, and so they came up with the Auris. Sales figures suddenly plummeted. Who's surprised? I know of an older woman who used to drive "the VW" and later "the Toyota". She was referring to the Beetle and Corolla respectively. And when she was at the Toyota dealer recently, he no longer had "the Toyota". Everything was there: Yaris, Auris, but no Toyota. Fortunately, her view of the world was restored with a used Corolla. There are enough positive examples: VW never renamed the Golf despite the war of the same name, the Passat still blows and the Polo still plays like it did back then. BMW has been building the 3 Series for what feels like the 10th generation, and Porsche has had the 911 in its range for as long as anyone can remember without anyone getting bored.
The fact that the Scirocco, Giulietta, Challenger, Charger and co. are celebrating a happy birthday is certainly also due to their melodious names. The fact is that a model name that has been well established over generations saves millions in advertising money. A new Opel Commodore or Cadillac Eldorado would be virtually self-explanatory and self-selling. Want to bet?
